In normal play outside of a therapeutic session we might like to go hard, but in breaking the psychic walls down we are only using those tools we picked in recreational dungeons and applying them on a case-by-case basis in the most effective manner. Up to this point we have focused on how we might apply this to a submissive, does this mean the dominants among us do not deserve healing or have to tough it out? Top Space is a more focused flow or the flow state artists work in. Many artists are also bipolar, and the flow exists in the manic swing. There can be a balance here, and part is showing up willing to work on that balance, productive but not in an obsessive or compulsive behavior space that if left unchecked builds into anxiety if not balanced out.
If you are a top, we do not have time for me to teach you how to use all of your toys or how to be proficient with them. It is a good idea if you are topping to make yourself a target of some kind to practice on. That way you are not practicing on a living breathing person. There are plenty of videos on Youtube. I cannot advocate for the ones who look like they are twirling glow sticks at a rave rather than trying to hurt someone.
Communication is always key, when we are first working with someone who will walk them through the level of pain to find what is going to be the one best of the situation. Give a light swat then stop to explain.
“That was me at a 2, do you want me to dial it up or are you fine there for now?”
Putting your back into a good session and breaking a sweat can prove to be a good work out. It's a good idea to get into shape before you begin this rather than using it as your sole means of exercise. If you do not, then you are not bringing your best self to the situation. The warmup phase of stretching is not just for the bottom, use stretching them to stretch yourself. Unless you are seeking our coaching service, we are not laying out a plan of fitness for you. As a bottom in protocol, it is just as much the responsibility of the top to deliver what you are agreeing to. This means proper conditioning.
How you take care of yourself is a reflection of who you are. Sure, this is one method of self-care, but the physical is just as important. Even as little as 20 minutes of exercise 3 times a week will make a difference. If you cannot make that kind of a commitment to yourself then you are not disciplined enough to stick with this either. I would focus on getting to a place where you can do that rather than doing a disservice to a prospective partner in this arena.
“Wait don’t body shame me, it’s not fault...insert excuse xy & z “
How do you know? What effort have you put into changing? Do you watch what you eat and exercise, yet still find yourself in your current condition? In this case it might be worth consulting a physician as there might be a more serious health issue. As with any fitness routine with this program you should make sure to consult a physician if you have had past injuries or health issues that make strenuous activities a risk. Anyone who tries to hide behind screams of calling people ableists, is nothing but an enabler, who would rather co-sign unhealthy behavior than seek the betterment of themselves and others. We are not here to coddle. This is a program of action.
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